Keeper of His Home

by Chelsea McCafferty

Owning the Role of Womanhood

15178297_10205770251895140_4852936928104574322_nI love being a woman. I have no desire whatsoever to be a man. God made me a woman with certain roles, strengths and even weaknesses. Men and women are different…to say otherwise is to ignore scientific fact, studies of the very nature of our genders and even common sense. We are different physically, emotionally and spiritually (in the sense of how God desires us to walk out the callings He has on our lives).

The world has fervently tried to convince us that men and women are the same. This is not about equality. In God’s eyes we are equal. Men are not better or higher than women, nor the other way around. In Galatians 3:28 God says, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” God says we are equal, so that’s not in question. We can all agree that women should hold an equal standing when it comes to rights. No problem there.

Equality does not mean we are interchangeable or indistinguishable. It does not mean we are equally suited for every activity. Again, science tells us that in some cases men are better suited for a task while in other situations a woman is better suited. Equal but different, and I’m so very grateful for that.

I’m so very willing to let my husband carry the heavy boxes. I’m so grateful that he mows the lawn. What’s more important is that he is the head of our home and that carries a responsibility that I have no desire at all to try and take away from him. He is responsible for the well-being of our family and keeping our home spiritually in order. He is our covering, answering to our Lord for our spiritual condition. That is a job I do not want. I’m grateful that I’m not called to that role….not that my role is easy either. haha

“Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.” Colossians 3:18

Submitting is voluntarily placing oneself under the authority of another. Submitting is not bondage or slavery or being a doormat or losing equality. Submitting is a beautiful act of selflessness and it’s something we are called to do all throughout life in many circumstances. We submit to the authority of police officers, teachers, employers and most importantly to God. Don’t be scared of submission in the home… there is great beauty in it and you will find that the best and most successful marriages were built on men loving their wives as Christ loved the Church, laying down their lives for their wives, and wives submitting to their husbands as unto the Lord. Beautiful.

I love being a woman. I love that God made me a nurturer, a mother, emotional, discerning, gentle and feminine. I love that I was able to give birth to a daughter. I love that I am the keeper of my home and that I have the ability to create an atmosphere of warmth and comfort and love in this place.

I love that God made my husband a man. I love that he is our covering and our protector. I love that he is logical to balance my emotion. I love that he works hard to provide and that he loves the Lord. God has a perfect plan, and while we are not perfect people, we are at peace in the center of His perfect will for us in regards to our roles as men and women.

Ultimately, God created man and woman in His image. I believer our attributes and different giftings are all a part of who God is. When a man and woman come together in the unity of marriage, we fit perfectly in every way, and we glorify God in this unity.

I am a woman and I love being a woman. I am equal with my husband and I’m in submission to my husband. I am valuable. I am free to give myself willingly to this man to whom I have pledged my life. I LOVE being a woman and I own it without shame, fear or regret.

Proverbs 31:10, “An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.”

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Younger Women Honoring the Elder

“Likewise, ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.” 1 Peter 5:5
Younger submit unto the elder. You know I’m going to age myself a bit to say that I think the younger generation has really lost the respect and honor that the older generation was taught to have for their elders. While this lack of respect seems to come from both genders, I’m going to address the young women who are called to submit to the teaching of their elders in the body of Christ.
I’ve met and discipled with some incredible young women in my time. It blesses my heart when young ladies come with open and teachable hearts. I consider myself at their age. Was I so receptive? Did I hunger for instruction as these girls do? I’m proud of these girls, knowing they have so many obstacles in their way as they press forward to Christ. These young ladies take Titus 2 and 1 Peter 5:5 seriously. They seek to learn from the spiritually older women.
Unfortunately for ever one young lady we see seeking discipleship and spiritual teaching, we seem to witness five of their peers turning their back to instruction, turning their nose up at the idea of discipleship and turning their attitudes away from submission and towards self-elevation. It’s not entirely their fault. Society is trying to raise generations of independent, confident and bold young women. In some ways their characteristics are good. We want young ladies to be independent enough to follow Christ alone if need be, confident in the gospel and bold to share the love of Christ. On the other hand, we see the world raising women who think they are too independent to need counsel from their elders, so confident in their own way of thinking that they are unwilling to submit to sound teaching, and bold to disrespect and dishonor elders instead of sitting at their feet of instruction.
For those of us who have daughters, we can see the challenge that lays ahead. The older generation will tell us that, in their time, elders were treated with respect. They would be honored for their years and wisdom. Young people would learn from them and be taught in the solid counsel of the Word. While the world tries to redirect our daughters into a “new” way of thinking that leads to self-focus and, quite frankly, arrogance, we need to train our daughters to walk in humility and to sit at the feet of the older women with open hearts and teachable spirits.
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Submitting to My Husband

 “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.” Ephesians 5:22-24

If you are a Christian woman the idea of submitting unto your husband’s leadership shouldn’t be too difficult a task for you. You should already be used to submitting unto the leadership of the Lord God and His Word. When we become believers we no longer belong to ourselves, but to Jesus. We commit ourselves to putting His plan for us ahead of our own plans. We ask that His will be done and we commit to submitting to Him in all things. Well, as we read in Ephesians, part of submitting to God’s will is submitting to our own husbands.

The Greek word for “submit” used in verse 22 is the word “hypotassō” which means, “to arrange under, to subordinate, to subject one’s self, to obey, to submit to one’s control, and to yield to one’s admonition or advice.” I love this word “submit.” Before God changed by heart, I feared the word. The word held only bad connotations for me.

The idea of being in submission was akin to being in slavery to some degree. The difference, however, between slavery and submission is monumental. Slaves are forced to be under another person’s control and have no control over their own lives. Submission occurs when someone places themselves under the leadership of another person voluntarily, out of their own free will. When we became Christians we put ourselves under the power of Jesus Christ and submitted our own will to Him. We surrendered control. When Jesus went to the cross, He too surrendered control and willingly submitted to the will of the Father, despite the horrible things He had to endure. What a beautiful act of love! How beautiful it is for wives to submit themselves unto their own husbands just as Jesus submitted Himself even unto the cross!

God commands wives to submit to their own husbands. Not only that, but we are to do it as unto the Lord. In the same way we submit ourselves to God’s authority, so ought we to submit ourselves to our husband’s authority. Unless our husband asks us to do something that is in violation to God’s Word, we should obey him and give him the reigns to direct the marriage and the household as the Lord leads him. The husband should have the final say and make the ultimate decision when a mutual agreement cannot be achieved. He has the right to veto any suggestions and to lead the household as he sees fit in areas of spiritual growth, finances, house rules, the raising and disciplining of children, where to live and how the household should be run. These are not merely my opinions, but the truth straight from God’s own Word.

Now, don’t get me wrong here. It is a good and loving thing for a husband to happily hear the suggestions, advice and opinions of his wife. Usually, if he is truly a good-willed Christian man, he will want to hear what his wife thinks and will care about how she feels. My husband loves to hear my outlook, as long as it is given in a respectful way and without nagging. He almost always asks my opinion when it comes to decision making and often will go with my preference if he doesn’t have a strong conviction either way. At the end of the day, he knows I will support him in his decision and be by his side as his helper whether I agree or not.

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