Keeper of His Home

by Chelsea McCafferty

She Does Him Good and Not Evil

on August 19, 2012

“The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.” Proverbs 31:11

The virtuous wife has found favor in the sight of her husband. His heart safely trusts her. The word “trust” in verse 11 is the Hebrew word “batach” which means, “to trust or trust in, have confidence in, be secure in, or to feel safe.” This husband knows that his wife is trustworthy. He feels safe and secure with her. He doesn’t worry that she will turn on him, leave him, mock him, insult him or shame him in any way. He doesn’t fear she will embarrass him in public or flirt with another man when he’s away. His heart trusts her because she has given him no reason to doubt her.

As he trusts in her in every manner of household and family life, he has no need to go searching elsewhere for his needs to be met. In other words, he knows she will be wise with their living supplies, so he doesn’t need to go scrapping somewhere else for it. This certainly can also apply to sex. Although it is never okay for a man to cheat on his wife, some men are more tempted to do so because of the lack of intimacy they receive at home. This man doesn’t need to look elsewhere for his sexual needs to be met, because his wife is meeting them.

“She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.” Proverbs 31:12

What a beautiful statement. It is so general and yet can be applied to even the smallest of daily activities. This wife has no desire to do evil to her husband. She does not speak badly about him to her friends. She does not chastise or mock him. She gives him good food, good clothes to wear, and good loving. She will always do what is best for him and will never be cruel. Her life’s purpose under the Lord is to do good unto her husband. She cares for her husband, raises his children and takes care of his home. It is a total, lifetime commitment to excellence, service and love. Wow.

      “Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.”

Proverbs 31:23

A man can be honored or dishonored by his wife. She can be a crown to him or shame that rots his bones. Have you ever been with a couple where the wife is constantly putting down her husband or mocking him, and you can just see in his eyes that she has crushed him? I heard wives do this to their husbands and it makes me so sad for them. They do not respect their husbands, nor are they being a wife who edifies and builds up, but one who tears down and breaks. Ladies, if this is you, it’s time to make some serious changes.

A virtuous wife adds to the good reputation of her husband. She does not spoil or ruin his reputation. When she is in public or with other people, she does not criticize or complain about her husband. She does not share about his bad habits or the stupid things he’s done. She does not make him sound like a fool or embarrass him, whether he is present or not. This includes when speaking to friends one to one. Speaking badly about your husband is NEVER acceptable ladies. The virtuous wife builds up her husband in all circumstances. She brags about his wit and good business decisions. She compliments his hard-work and dedication. She dotes on him and says uplifting things about him, especially when he is there to hear it. This builds up your husband. Show your respect for him publically that you can be a crown to him and add to his reputation.

Furthermore this wife has taken care of her husband and household so that others are impressed. She provides him good clothing, feeds him well and takes care of the home. He will not be ashamed to bring friends over, because she has kept the home in respectable shape. She has trained their children to be respectful, so that they are not an embarrassment to their father, but obedient and polite. A man with a wife like this can be proud of his family and home, and this means more to him than we are likely to understand. Step up to the plate ladies. It’s your turn. How can you honor your husband today?

3 responses to “She Does Him Good and Not Evil

  1. Valeri Barnes says:

    Good words!!!

  2. Zoie says:

    I would not consider myself a “religious” person. I don’t read the bible, I don’t regularly attend church, and some would consider my views “new age” or “spiritual, not religious.” That being said, I find this post to be very intriguing. I am surprised, but glad, that I read it today.

    I am not a wife, but someday soon I should hope to be. The ideals of “building up” your man are not merely a religious or biblical view, but a moral ideal that should be practiced in every home. Just as the woman should build up the man, so should the man build up the woman. It is respect, it fosters a continued trust, and it should be the foundation of your relationship. I am the picture of the woman you paint. I cook, I clean, I sew, I love my man and all of his quirks and inadiquacies, because those are the things that make him the man that I fell so deeply in love with. I will always cherish him, and I will tell him that I love him several times a day, because I do and he deserves to hear it. What I get in return is worth far more than materialistic things. I get love, safety, security in knowing that he is by my side loving me and only me. I will never have to worry that he will stray or be dishonest, as long as I am faithful and truthful and provide him a home that he can feel safe in. He may annoy me at times, but I would never embarrass him because that would chip away at the foundation of trust that we have built.

    And,(directed only at the people that would consider this old fashioned or backwards…) this viewpoint doesn’t make me any less of a woman, it makes me more of one.

    Thank you for sharing your posts Chelsea, they are interesting and thoughtful.

    • Thank you Zoie for reading and also for sharing! I especially love your last line there, “And,(directed only at the people that would consider this old fashioned or backwards…) this viewpoint doesn’t make me any less of a woman, it makes me more of one.” Couldn’t agree with you more! Thanks again and may you have a blessed day!

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