Keeper of His Home

by Chelsea McCafferty

Being Discreet

on August 10, 2012

“The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” Titus 2:3-5

The word “discreet” is the Greek word “sōphrōn” which means, “of a sound mind, sane, in one’s senses, curbing one’s desires and impulses, self-controlled and temperate.” Being discreet is to be controlled and disciplined in all areas of your life. That does not mean you cannot have fun. A classy woman can certainly be discreet and have fun at the same time. Just don’t get out of control and make a fool of yourself!

Whenever I think of this word, the first image that pops into my mind is of one of those classic actresses from the black and white movies who were so well-put together and graceful at all times. These ladies were proper and dignified. They did not open their mouths for rude and obnoxious comments to come forth. They did not behave as if they were intoxicated, being loud and brassy and forceful. They were controlled, reserved and discreet. While generations and times are changing, and we the classy women of yesterday’s films have been replaced by crude and immodest women who are anything but disciplined, God’s desire for the role of the wife has not changed. And secretly, although men of today may be scared to say so for fear of being persecuted by the liberal left-wing feminists, most husbands still want a discreet wife by their side.

So what characteristics make one discreet? In public, a woman’s behavior should be dignified and controlled. Dress appropriately and modestly. Today, too many women in the church are dressing as if they are trying to get attention for their bodies. Wives, your body is for your husband alone, so cover up that exposed skin and dress in a way that speaks of your modesty. When speaking to others, try not to be too loud or boisterous. Do not squeeze your way into other people’s conversations unless you know it’s appropriate. Do not be forceful and avoid gossip by any means necessary. When speaking of your husband, never criticize him in front of others, even when he is not present. Build him up and speak only positive things. Talking disrespectfully about your husband, whether he is there or not, is a sin according to God’s Word. Furthermore, be cautious about what you share in conversations. Do not disclose all aspects of your personal life, especially if you know your husband would not approve.

Be reserved and ladylike. Femininity is beautiful to the Lord and to your husband. Do not be afraid to be soft, gentle and feminine. This is for public or private life. It is still important to be discreet at home with your hubby and children. In other words, do not be loud-mouthed, bossy or masculine at home either. When your husband comes home from work, let him come home to a pleasant home and a wife who is looking good for him. While wearing sweats and having your hair up in a messy ponytail on your head is comfortable and fine for cleaning house, try and make yourself pretty by the time your man walks in that door. He will appreciate it.

Being discreet includes your actions. A woman who runs up thousands of dollars on her credit card on impulse buys is not being discreet. A woman who hangs her bras out to dry on a clothesline in the front yard in the middle of town is not being discreet. A woman who screams at her kids in the grocery store when they are misbehaving is not being discreet. The Lord desires us to be a people of discipline and self-control. The world is full of people acting and talking however they like with no regard to discretion. Your discreet attitude will not only make your husband and children proud of you, but it will be a witnessing tool to others as they notice that something is different about you and begin to seek it out. Be discreet.

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